you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
