my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
