susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
