You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
