Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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