No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
