their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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