i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
