Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
