But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Your face is a jimmy john
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
