I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
