How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
