how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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