their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
