Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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