So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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