Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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