I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
