ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
