Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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