So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Randomize
