On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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