ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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