it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
