I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize