I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
