Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
you inspire me to be a worse person
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Randomize
