im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
