do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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