dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
worst night to have a conscience
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
