worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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