in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
