check it out our google latitudes are spooning
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize