Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Randomize
