I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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