i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Randomize
