You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize