I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
