Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
