I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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