she is the kim kardashian of front butts
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
