I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Randomize
