U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
