Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Randomize
