I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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