Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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