would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
