I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
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