if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize