he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
They took my balls.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
